Not another day in the office

Saturday 30th October
Rehearsals and filming for Good News Week episodes 3:34 and 3:35 at the ABC studios in Ultimo
9:51am- My stockings have a hole in them. Do I risk it or wear different stockings?
10:30am- On the bus with new stockings. Potentially late due to long discussion about video clips and Harry Potter.
10:35am- Far from making me late, long discussion has prevented me being insanely early.
10:41am- Sitting in the Green Room with one of the stand ins. It’s almost eerily quiet here. 
10:42am- Various people are now scouring the papers for a picture of John Howard. Paul is wearing a captain’s hat. 
10:46am- Loud discussions about Paul’s hat. 
10:54am- All stand ins now present and accounted for. Tom has found a new celebrity to compare my new haircut to. 
11:00am- Going into the studio.
11:04am– Today I am Cal Wilson and Julia Morrow. Not at the same time. 
11:15am- Paul is stuffing up the autocue. He is, therefore, demanding his captains hat. Crew member runs off to find the hat.
11:17am- Hat seems, surprisingly, to be helping.     
11:35am- I have a slapstick. Its extremely amusing. Wasn’t previously aware that there was such a thing and now I kind of want one.
11:37am- Ian is surprised that Mikey and I know what foley is. I’m often surprised at which sections of my knowledge he finds surprising.
11:50pm- Ah Hot Spot. Where I get to stand very still and not say anything for several minutes. I’d like to be funny during rehearsals, I really would, but is something about them that makes me revert to shy mode. And shy mode isn’t conducive to funny. 
12:11pm- Mikey’s hat is trying to asphyxiate him. Which is a shame. Because its an awesome hat. 
12:20pm- Now we get to throw shoes at Paul. Seriously. Oh the hilarity.
11:46pm- Actually these shoes are really nice. And also my size…
12:34pm- We’re supposed to be trying to miss. This makes me slightly nervous because, with my coordination skills I’ll probably aim wrong and hit him. 
12:52pm- One of the crew members did it for me. Excellent.
1:02pm- Annnnnd- run to the toilet. 
1:10pm- The point in the afternoon when you realise you’ve only rehearsed one show, there is still one to go and then they have to film them. And suddenly, you feel very sleepy. 
1:23pm- Talking to Ian about Hitchhiker and therefore do not leap suddenly out of my chair when Paul cues me. Am heckled. Its nice that this doesn’t bother me at all.
1:25pm- I hate having to stand up and do things. 
1:34pm- Crew member- “Can we do the light box again?”
Paul- “Its not a light box. It’s a box with lights on it.”
1:40pm– Today my clue is a song. On the plus side this has minimal risk of serious injury. On the downside, it means I have to stand up again. 
1:44pm- Time for sandwiches, nom nom nom. 
1:45pm- Just told Claire how to spell konichiwa. This is the first thing I’ve ever said to her, despite almost being killed by mousetraps while pretending to be her.
1:53pm- Eating an apple and talking sushi.
2:05pm– This is my least favourite part of the afternoon. When nothings happening. But Ian’s turning up the volume on the TVs so it must almost be time to retire to Claire’s dressing room.
2:10pm- Blocking up the hallway while we wait for the dressing room to clear. 
2:22pm- Me- “I shouldn’t talk. I was a random child in the Green Room once.”
Ian- “Yes but you weren’t crawling around on the floor.”
2:30pm- I think the way I tend to feel at this point in the afternoon could be explained by melatonin levels and lack of sunlight. Or something.
2:45pm- So what actually happens at this point in the afternoon? There is a television monitor in Claire’s dressing room, on which Ian and any stand ins or writers currently in residence watch the show. 
3:11pm- “Shoe and A” goes off almost without a hitch. Unless of course you count Paul’s thumb being impaled on a stiletto as a hitch. 
5:14pm- First show done and dusted. Food food food.
5:30pm- Tracey is here. Tracey worked with GNW-TV when I was here for Sideshow. The chances of her remembering me are slim but she was really nice to me. She helped me quite a few times when I was standing around looking lost. 
5:57pm- Just got a call to say the people I’ve been staying with are out the front. I could go out and get them but then I wouldn’t be able to get back in.
6:01pm- Where could Ian and his pass possibly be hiding.
6:03pm- Found Ian. Located peeps. Re-entered ABC.
Ian- “Its not as exciting as Alex thinks it is.”
Me- “If it hasn’t worn off yet you think there might be something in it?”
6:05pm- Paul- “What a lovely collection of frocks just walked in.”
6:10pm- I like having other people here. Partly because I like showing it to people but also because when other people are excited I’m allowed to get excited too. Which is kind of nice. Because I do still get excited. Every time.
6:16pm- Have loaded audience members. Now to sit in the corner and look busy for a while. 
6:34pm- Dear brain, this is actually not a particularly good time to have a light bulb moment about that short story. Points for trying but could we talk about this later?
7:04pm- Back in the dressing room. Second show. 
7:15pm- Got a few jokes in this monologue. Some of them even got decent laughs. And that always gives me a pleasant internal glow. 
7:17pm- Ian- “Benedict’s a wanker.”
Residents of dressing room- *clap clap clap clap clap*
7:30pm- For the first time ever I have a cup of tea during filming. And immediately wonder why I haven’t had one before.
7:34pm- Right up until I laugh and spray tea over my dress.
7:35pm- Akmal can juggle. This is actually quite impressive. 
8:45pm- Ian’s gone home. 
9:16pm- Go and fetch peeps from the audience. I think I’m ready to go home.
9:20pm- I always think I’ll be fine. I know I’m coming back now, its only a matter of when. But then it comes to actually leaving. And I’m not really fine at all. 

Further reading

December – home

I spent the first minutes of 2018 on the beach. I’ve never actually spent New Year